Over the past 4 months
I have had an array of emotions and thoughts run through my heart and mind. I
have been hurt, unheard, and have felt abandoned by people that over the span
of some 5 years I had poured my life into. I admit I made mistakes along the
way, but they have only proved to make me a better person as I have learned
from them. However, I can honestly say that in every circumstance, every
situation, I strived with the best of my ability to bring Glory to God by
standing up for what I believed was best for the Body of Christ I served. Over
the past 3 years I strived to better myself even more, by going to counseling 2
years in a row for a span of 3 months per year (2015, 2016). And no one
prompted me to go to counseling. I did this on my own accord to strive to be
the best Man of God I could be. And I can wholeheartedly hold my head up and
say that I not only strived to become a better Pastor and Servant of Christ, I
believe I did. Perhaps that is what perplexes me the most when I think of how
things ended with a Body of Believer's of whom my family and I had poured 20 years
of life, our families, and ministry into.
Over the past two
weeks I have come to a crossroads as far as how to handle things from here.
Amidst the struggle, God has continually brought the passages of scripture
below to the forefront of my mind. And although it has taken time, tears, and a
humbling of myself to not seek revenge, I am finally at peace and have let go
and have laid everything at the feet of Christ. Do I still hurt? Do I hurt for
my children, my wife, my parents, my sister and her family? Do I hurt for those
who were innocent bystanders, but themselves have been hurt, or at the very
least, left confused by it all? Yes. Healing will take time, but it will come.
God is fully in control and He will make things right, even in dealing justly
with those who took part in the hurting.
I write this publicly
for two reasons: One, to let you know that I have placed everything that has
happened over these past 4 months in God's hands. He knows what is right, what
is true, and will deal with those of whom need dealing with. Secondly, I want
you to know that Tullahoma Church Plant is not being done out of retaliation, ill will, or as a competition to any
other church in or around Tullahoma. This church plant is being planted because
God has called me to continue serving Him here where he placed me in June of
2012, Tullahoma.
Sometimes God's best
plan comes out of what seems like tragedy. But in all reality, what we deem as
a tragedy, is in all reality a part of His greater plan. For several years God
has been speaking to me about stepping out and planting a new church right here
in Tullahoma. A church for those who have given up on church. A church for
those who are broken, hurting, addicted to drugs, struggling through divorce,
contemplating suicide, and a host of other issues people face that Tullahoma Church Plant will minister to.
Genesis 50:20 really sums things up... "You intended to harm me, but God
intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many
lives".
I truly believe this
verse explains the "what" and "why" of what has happened to
me, and for that I am grateful!
The following passages
are ones God has set before me in recent days...
Philippians 1:12-19 - Now I want you to know, brothers and
sisters,[b] that what has happened to me has actually served to advance the
gospel. 13 As a result, it has become clear throughout the whole palace guard
and to everyone else that I am in chains for Christ. 14 And because of my
chains, most of the brothers and sisters have become confident in the Lord and
dare all the more to proclaim the gospel without fear.
15 It is true that
some preach Christ out of envy and rivalry, but others out of goodwill. 16 The
latter do so out of love, knowing that I am put here for the defense of the gospel.
17 The former preach Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely, supposing
that they can stir up trouble for me while I am in chains. 18 But what does it
matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or
true, Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice.
Yes, and I will
continue to rejoice, 19 for I know that through your prayers and God’s
provision of the Spirit of Jesus Christ what has happened to me will turn out
for my deliverance. (The Apostle Paul)
Romans 12:9-21 - Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil;
cling to what is good. 10 Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another
above yourselves. 11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor,
serving the Lord. 12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in
prayer. 13 Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
14 Bless those who
persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn
with those who mourn. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but
be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.
17 Do not repay anyone
evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it
is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do
not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is
written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”[d] says the Lord. 20 On the
contrary:
“If your enemy is
hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this,
you will heap burning coals on his head.” 21 Do not be overcome by evil, but
overcome evil with good. (The Apostle Paul)
May God bring us to
peace in the days, months, and years to come as we all work together to advance
the Gospel and further the Kingdom with the Hope that is Christ.
In Him Alone,
Pastor Christian Watts
No comments:
Post a Comment